Jealousy

My girlfriend and I are dating since 6 or 7 years. She’s a brilliant brunette, very intelligent and beautiful.
When I was younger I catch my dad cheating on my mother. Ever since I can’t really trust women. And that’s a big issue.
Indeed, the more I live with my girlfriend, the less I trust her, that is very weird.

I never had a “mommy issue” but it looks very bizarre as I am afraid than I could lost my girlfriend.
Indeed, there’s a few months, she told me that she has a new male colleague, that she likes to work with because they have the same backgrounds. In her job, that’s very cool for her to have someone like her.
Ever since then I am spying on her: emails, telephone, schedule…. Every night after her work, I question her to know what they did, how was her day and plenty of questions.

She’s so upset with me, my behavior and she tells me that she will leave me if I keep going.

I am quite afraid..of her decision and my behavior.
Jealousy seems to be love and hate at the same time.

 

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